Do we need to raise a male child to be a tough guy?

Not necessarily

I was not raised to be tough nor be a fighter at all. Never had to be. I was never one to fight with boys in school. Education was first. What causes a boy to be tough is agression. Agression can be a very bad thing to have. Some people are killers and murderers because of the way they were raised. What parents do their their child and teenager can have a very profound effect on the person.

If you have a brother that always hit you and fought with you. It needs to stop! That sort of thing can slip out when you are an adult. You might unintentionally hit a friend as a reaction when another friend does something that stemmed from your childhood. Its like a jerk-reaction. It happens because you have been beat up so much and too much, that the reaction still happens even if you are now middle-age.

It's about control.

There is nothing wrong with a man being sensitive and caring. There is nothing wrong with a man crying at his first child's birth or crying at a dramatic movie with a sad ending.

It is better to cry instead of getting violently mad.

Since much of personality is innate (we're born the way we are), I'd say not. Tomboys and princesses, rambos and sensitive guys just develop as they are supposed to. Trying to change how your child is leaning can lead to all sorts of problems later. As a high school biology teacher for 25+ years I have seen well adjusted, confident, well rounded, terrific kids of all kinds. I've also seen some pretty twisted ones thanks to the efforts of well meaning parents. So just enjoy the kid you have, and remember that he is NOT an extension of you. :)

have u heard of the terms "natural selection" or "alpha male"? you dont necessarily have to teach your son to be tough but it would be your call. just dont have a confused look on your face when he gets beat up alot.

not really. i mean horse around with the little guy, show him to be careful with strength, but learning humility and restraint is much tougher. kids with dads that have a short man complex are much more violent and have more to prove than kids with a gentle, courageous father.

This is a fallacy - a lot of men are quiet, kind and sensitive. And what's wrong with that? :-)

not a tough guy necesarily, but a man yes.