Mood after affair?

it means your husband's a *****. relieve yourself of him, he cheated on YOU.

It is called permanent damage, you will never get over it and it with bother you for the rest of your life. Make the best of it or take steps to dissolve the marriage. 

Well, he got caught and now he wants you to forgive him and move on. He thinks that since it’s out in the open and he apologized the slate is clean. Broken trust is hard to get over. 

I found out my husband cheated on me when we were dating AND the night before our wedding. Pretty sure he’s been cheating our entire marriage of 25 years.(he doesn’t know I know) I’m heartbroken. But I decided to just keep quiet ,get my kids thru school and go from there. 

You only have 2 choices: forgive him completely and move forward with marriage or leave

Good luck to you!

Leave your marriage and divorce him

She cheated on you and that means its time to divorce him and move on. He has shown he can't be trusted

Since the pattern is repeating and he's being emotionally distant, marriage counseling is a good idea.

After knowing about broken trust, it is really tough to be a cheerful person. Emotionally, you have to face tough time ahead. Not days or weeks but after few months or may be Year, your grief will come down. So, be brave. I have gone through similar situation like yours. Time is the only solution.   

Sounds like it means he intends for you to pay the mental and emotional price for his infidelity and he intends to pay zero for it. Why are you falling for that? 

I’ll offer a tiny bit of insight that hopefully you’ll get something out of.

The grief process applies to a whole lot more than just one type of loss or grief.

The relationship you and your husband had prior to your discovery is metaphorically “dead.”  And with it went trust elements, the respect you had for a “faithful husband,” etc.  He knows this.

The relationship you have now is something very different because of the infidelity.  Of course it can work and recover; however, the “death” of the old one feels very real for both of you.

The grief process applies to your former marriage relationship.  First stage: denial...everything going along almost normally, seemingly too easy?  Second stage: bargaining, where you may think to yourself, “maybe if I do this or that everything will go back to the way it was.”  And because it can’t?  Third stage is anger. And that will show up in all sorts of ways.

You sound like you’re still in that bargaining stage, (maybe still in denial?) making concessions and trying to fix and control things back to the way it was.  Do a little reading on grief so you can recognize what’s going on around you.

I’m no therapist or professional anything.  I’m just a guy who’s been around and experienced a lot.

I know that once I have a little idea on where emotions are coming from, I can deal with them and other people better.

I hope this helps you and I wish you the best.

maybe you should talk to him about it