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Lv 7
? asked in Arts & HumanitiesPoetry · 5 years ago

Is Sun Sonata a good title for this?

Scheme a sordid scene, revenge and war,

patented impending doom du jour.

marching endless sea of ordered troops,

scavengers fed fowl kept clipped in coops .

Dress the brass in tactless shabby blues,

nom de guerre, new alibis assumed.

execute plan 'x' in section 'y'

genome locks and neural networks die.

Rocket to the moon or south of Rome.

Cosmonauts create a cache of clones.

Evolutionary trade secrets are sent

to bigger solar systems, trillions spent.

Contained within a space-junk littered haze,

The coda of the sun sonata plays.

5 Answers

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  • 5 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    It is alright for a great poem.

    But,Our Future fits better.

    Or,Doom Du Jour.

  • 5 years ago

    I like the title Sun Sonata. I also enjoyed the last stanza.

  • 5 years ago

    I would answer in a rhyme

    But I must be going

    As always your work

    Is sunny and glowing.

  • 5 years ago

    Its been far too long since I've read your poetry. The title is fine, the poem is yours, you own it. Kudos.

  • 5 years ago

    LC, you are playful in this.

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